Have we accepted ‘modern’ families?
01 Sep 2010At work, we get the Calgary Herald, the Globe and Mail and the National Post each day. I don’t generally read them, as I get all of my news online at my desk, but occasionally whizzing by the kitchen, one of the papers will grab my eye.
The other day, it was an article in the entertainment section of the Calgary Herald, on the Emmy’s. Now, before I begin, I have to note that the Herald denied me my favourite pasttime of blaming them entirely for this strange article, because it was written by Reuters. I was a little sad, because I do love finding faulty logic in the Herald, it is an asshole hobby that I have. (And don’t worry, I do it with equal fervor to the Globe too.)
The was article was entitled, “Emmy wins prove ‘modern’ families are U.S. hits,” and you may be able to guess where they’re going with this. Yup, they’re talking about race and homosexuality. The essential thesis of the article is that because Modern Family won the Best Comedy Emmy, it must mean that Americans are more open to interracial adoptions and being gay.
I suppose I get where this article was trying to go, but I take exception with its conclusions and in particular, the people interviewed for it.
I took exception to the self-congratulatory about the tone of the article, like “Yay! Look at our society! We’re progressing!” and the quick conclusions that it reached about how the average American views gay people. I don’t think congratulations are in order, because we have a long way to go before we reach true acceptance of “alternative families.”
The first point that I found problematic was made by Todd Gold, the managing editor of Fancast.com:
While many may disagree with issues like gay marriage, (Americans) have shown that they are incredibly tolerant and accepting when it comes to entertainment
I’m sorry, I don’t get what that means. To me that says that Americans are okay with theoretical gay people, but not when they get married, move next door and have kids. If that’s the case, fine, that’s a separate issue – but that doesn’t mean that people are tolerant and accepting.
Tolerance in entertainment is not necessarily reflective of tolerance in real life. History has shown repeatedly that we are willing be entertained by those that we do not necessarily appreciate or respect (prostitutes, gladiators…sorry I was free-associating, but you get the idea.) You might even go as far as to say that entertainers are a lower class, in that sort of “dance, monkey, dance!” kind of way. So it does not matter that we don’t support them getting married, they’re beneath us.
In addition, the gay couple in the show emphasize parental responsibility. “They are not finger-snappy fabulous gay guys. They are more homey, slightly nerdier, smarter gay guys and in many ways the most traditional of the parental units in our show, so I don’t think we ever thought that was going to be too much for Americans to accept,” said Lloyd.
Oh, Lloyd. Christopher Lloyd is the co-creator of Modern Family and I have to point out that he is currently in hot water with the kids on the social networks, because the gay couple on Modern Family has not yet kissed, after a whole season. I’m just going to let that sit.
Also, notice how the writer made the connection between parental responsibility and flamboyant gay men vs. traditional parental units? Sneaky.
Flamboyance is something that I have noticed is great sticking point for a lot of people – they have no problem with people being gay, as long as they don’t act gay. It calls into question their understanding of gender norms and the social structure. It’s unnerving and foreign.
I personally don’t have a problem with flamboyance, I have a problem with the assumption that gay men are flamboyant. In reality, gay parents probably don’t even act flamboyant. They’re focused on their kid, just like every other parent, not traipsing around like a club rat cliché. If anyone is flamboyant, it’s the 18-year-old gay man sorting through their own identity, and to that, I counter with the screechy 18-year-old teenage girl. Both are equally irritating and confused. But in women, we find that endearing.
In the end, I do agree with Todd Gold that Hollywood is reflecting changes in society. They’re not widespread changes, but they’re still afoot. I also agree that the millennial generation is much more comfortable with “alternative families” than older generations. Our parents broke the traditional marriage model, and we got through it okay, so what’s wrong with two people of the same sex coupling up? Surely it’s no more damaging than being told that you have a new father at 10.
Hollywood is a pretty liberal place and I think those of us who are of the liberal persuasion like to think we’re so awesome – we’ve accepted gay people like the rest of us! But there’s a lot of prejudice and sense of the “other” that still clouds the way society as a whole treats people in same sex relationships. We shouldn’t give ourselves too much credit, winning an Emmy is cute, but it’s not the end zone. Especially if they haven’t even kissed!
Tags: acceptance, bigotry, Emmy, gender norms, homosexuality, Modern Family, society, television, tolerance






